Jamberry Seuss

Will you buy jamberry nails?

I can put some in the mail!

I do not want jamberry nails.

My reasoning’s a simple tale.

I would not wear them here or there.

I would not wear them anywhere.

Would you buy them at my house?

What if they had a cute mouse?

I do not want jamberry nails.

My wallet, honey, will prevail.

I cannot spend, so please don’t pounce.

I just set traps when I hear “mouse”.

You can buy them all online!

What if they were colored lime?

I do not want jamberry nails.

Your constant begging please curtail.

I do not want them to be mine.

This is getting asinine.

Listen closely, one last time.

Bare fingernails are not a crime.

Not at your house. Not with a mouse.

Not all online. Not colored lime.

I do not want jamberry nails.

I do not want them, #fail.

 *Because snark often comes across as rude when read on the internet, I feel the need to explain that I hold no ill will towards the many, many, many friends I have that are selling this product. I also hold no ill will toward the product itself. There are actually a couple I think look alright, even though they remind me of the stickers we put on our nails in kindergarten. I do, however, hold ill will toward anyone that is only my friend if I am buying something from them. You can move along. ;)